Recently I had a chance to talk to many people ranging from teen boys and girls to adults who are well settled. I talked to each one of them for hours. It gave me an opportunity to peep inside them and connect with their thought process. Some were discussing career issues with me. Others had a health or family related discussions. After each discussion, I reflected about how to put across my points in better manner. Here is the summary.
1. Listen more, speak less
2. Bring out thoughts of other person by leaving open ended question
3. Ask the person to summarise what he understood. In short, engage them.
4. Ask the person to raise counter questions. Help him with counter questions.
5. Be definitive with your solutions.
6. Take the person onto a journey to the future. Give him visions. Show the alternatives
7. Give them the dream
8. Generate the belief that they can do it
9. Never doubt. Never scold. Just understand. Make them realise.
10. Be non-judgemental. Be unconditional. Be empathic.
As a counselor, counselor should structure the thoughts and arguments and keep the examples ready because people do not understand abstract easily. Counselor should also observe the tone of the speech such that it should be arousing the listener in appropriate manner.
